who gets to drive the clown car this time?

gop clown car by hip is everything

yeah, I know 2016 is still  2 years away, and we still have to get through the midterm elections of 2014 with some version of democracy and sanity still remotely intact, as hard as that may be to pull off within today’s political landscape  …
but ya’ gotta admit, the most interesting  and entertaining game in town is trying to figure out who the teathuglicans will roll out to be slaughtered at the polls by hillary or whomever else the democrats decide they want to be the next president …
and the way things are looking, they could roll out spongebob squarepants and he’d still win by a freaking landslide … 
will it be the ever bizarre, and completely out of touch with any semblance of reality, ted “have you ever been, or do you know anyone who has ever been, a communist?” cruz? …
or maybe the brother of the controversial surrealist, child painter george w. bush,  jebediah? …
who knows, maybe it will be the plagiarist in chief himself, rand “the human photocopy machine” paul …
jesus h. christ, we could even win the goofball/gasbag lottery and it could be a rerun of last time’s clown car demolition derby, and we might even see rick “oops” perry, or herman “999” cain, or maybe even rick “frothy” santorum, providing he can pull himself away from his never ending “research” on bestiality, homo-sexuality and the perils of contraception …
i hear marsha “women don’t really want equal pay” blackburn is even considering a run for the big house on pennsylvania avenue …
oh, the stupid, it burns …
and ya’ just know that the alaskan barbie, “palin the wailin’” has gotta be running out of donero from her last scam and is going to need to satisfy both her creditors and her narcissism with another fake campaign …
well, half a campaign …
before the inevitable withdrawal due to the literacy tests that her fellow red-state oligarch shills will surely try to impose on everyone before the real voting starts …
personally, I think the gop should just cut the subterfuge and run a glenn beck/alex jones ticket and show america once and for all who they really have become …
let’s see michael “talking points” steele and party chairman rank penis spin that one …
even with the help of scrotus scotus this is really going to be three choruses of “to dream the impossible dream” followed by a rousing version of “i’m an asshole” and finishing up with “the party’s over” …
this is not yer’ grand-dad’s gop kids …
as a blogger who focuses on primarily politics, i know i for one, will be keeping all my fingers and toes crossed that they all run …
shit, if i could cross my balls and still sit down to type without sounding like justin beiber, i would do that too …
these guys just write the jokes themselves and all I have to do is cut ‘n’ paste my way to hilarity …
oh, the irony, cut and pasting rand paul’s cut and pastes …
somebody’s gonna have to pay some serious royalties to wikipedia before this political season is over …
don’t get me wrong kids, i’m not so sure that today’s dems as a whole are a whole lot better at governance, but at least they’ll throw ya’ a couple of bones on their way to the bank …
and they’ll probably let people of color, poor people, women and “the gays” still vote when it’s all over …
ahhh … democracy, ya’ gotta love it eh? …
later …
peace out …

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