trump tv to debut november 9th

The Trump TV Network will debut at 12:01 AM on Wednesday, November 9, with an all female lineup of LIVE shows Monday to Friday, with ads selling Trump family products filling the rest of the day. The morning lineup kicks off at 6 A.M. with the angry wailing and whining of Anne ‘the man’ Coulter with “The Hate Machine”. At 7:00 we have Kellyanne Conway with “The Shrill Shill”, a show dedicated to the awesomeness and glory that is Donald J. Trump, master of his known universe. At 8:00 it’s the only black voter in America who will have ever actually voted for Donald, Omarosa Manigault with “Anything For A Buck”, a show dedicated to anything for a buck. From 9-9:30 it will be Katrina Pierson with “The Conspiracy Report”, an in depth, incredibly skewed look at all the latest conspiracies about anyone named Clinton or Obama. From 9:30-11 viewers will be treated to Kellie Scott Hughes, Kayleigh McEnany, Jan Brewer, Phyllis Schlafly, Elisabeth “I Hate Obama!” Hasselbeck and former Second Daughter Liz ‘the little ball of hate’ Cheney who will host a ‘View’ styled roundtable called “Tears of Impotent Rage”. From11:00 – 1:00 former Congresswoman Michele Bachmann and former beauty queen (first runner up in a long ago Miss Alaska contest), the Klondike Kardashian herself, Sarah Palin will anchor the early afternoon slot with a show called “Word Salad”, sort of a Point-Counterpoint for factually challenged that quickly descends into nonsense, hissing and madness, with a heaping helping of hatred and two cups of stupid thrown in for good measure. Rounding out the afternoon lineup will be “Melania’s Home Shopping Spree”, broadcast for 5 straight hours live daily (1:00 – 6:00 P.M.) from her gold encrusted suite atop the Trump Tower, where she will sell fashions and accessories that she and step daughter Ivanka have stolen from designers around the world …
Trump also made news when he announced that he and fellow conspiracy theorist and bestial porn lover Steve Bannon intend to spin off a companion channel featuring Former Governor and soon to be indicted Chris Christie, Trump sycophant Jeffrey Lord, former Mayor Rudy “911!!!, 911!!!, 911!!!” Giuliani, renowned sports gambler, the ever desperate Pete Rose, former boxer and convicted rapist Mike Tyson, as well as former Hollywood icon and mayor of Carmel, California, Clint ‘the Chair-man’ Eastwood. And YES! kids the chair will be back … someone’s gotta make sense in all this … go chair!
On the wish list are shows featuring bagger faves George Zimmerman with ‘This Week In Cowardice’, Phil Robertson of Duck Dynasty fame with his new show ‘Pulpit and Buckshot’ – a weekly look at what’s wrong with the gays and the fornicators, Wayne LaPierre, bloodied leader of the NRA just selling lotsa guns, Ben Carson, (to prove there’s no racism here), former Maricopa Sheriff and soon to be indicted Joe Arpaio, renowned draft dodger, pedophile and all around chicken-shit Ted Nugent, world class moron and whack job Bobby Knight, grifter and con artist Newt Blingrich, race baiter Sean Hannity, the ever bigoted Pat ‘the ass-hat’ Buchanan, ex-pitcher and full time homophobe Curt Schilling. Former grand master of the KKK David Duke and king of the tin-foil hats, raving lunatic Alex Jones would be on the evening anchor desk.
The Dongald will call in to ALL the shows to express his views on topics presented that day.
There is even speculation that Trump’s African American will get his own show!
Can’t wait! …

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