BREAKING … Pence OUT!

2020 let it burn

WASHINGTON   Resident Scump announced through his newest press secretary, David Duke, that he would be dropping Mike Pence from the 2020 ticket because “Mike is just not white enough, just not loyal enough, and totally unwilling to swallow. NO COLLUSION!” The Whiter House didn’t announce officially who would fill the VP slot on the GOP/PutinCorp ticket in the upcoming 2020 presidential contest, but hinted that either Ivanka Trump or Vladimir Putin as the most likely contenders for the prestigious position of head sycophant and fluffer to the glorious leader Fat Donnie Two Scoops, or as he now prefers to be called, Sum Dim Phuc. Ivanka Trump does seem to have the inside track on the position for two reasons according to ‘alternate press secretary’ Skeleton Anne Conway because as Bullshit Barbie pointed out “One, she, unlike vice president Pence, does swallow, and two, Mr. Putin would NEVER accept the second banana position whereas it’s uncertain if Ms. Trump can even spell banana.”
           “All the top dictators have like 3 names, Kim, MBS, Vlad the Impaler, all the best ones”
Trump recently told renowned hate monger, and all around treasonous, vile bitch Laura Ingraham when he dropped in on her “60 Really Angry, Really White Minutes” show on Faux Noise, explaining the recent name and title change. “Also, the racism and hatred really worked for me last time so I’ll be ramping that shit up bigly. Expect some actual deaths at my rallies this cycle, it’s gunna be amazing. I don’t wanna spoil the surprise but if you’re into some good old fashioned pedophilic rape and human sacrifice with just a hint of lynching, then stay tuned. It’s gunna be the greatest display of ignorance and racism EVER! NO COLLUSION!” At that point Ms. Ingraham came and ended the show abruptly.

“give me your …”

“Give me your tired, your poor, Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, The wretched refuse of your teeming shore, Send these, the homeless, tempest-tost to me, I lift my lamp beside the golden door!” – Emma Lazarus (1883)

JobivYp
“Compassion”  by David Garibaldi

The original painting was created on World Refugee Day in June of 2018.  It represents the compassion America can still show for those who seek a better life from all over the world.
-David Garibaldi

Moron Moments With Fat Donnie Two Scoops

Moron Moments

TODAY’S RECIPE: “KIDNEY WORD SALAD”

2 parts moron
2 parts illiterate old man
4 parts clueless and confused
65 LBs KFC Extra Crunchy
2-50 gallon drums of  ‘Vlad’s Extra Strength Spray Tan (Shit-stained Pumpkin #45)
Innumerable Diet Cokes
More than a little bloviating dementia
Several large scoops of sexual assault, rape and incestuous ‘shroom pounding.
Mix well and spew

The fuckery rolls northward …

Be ashamed Alberta, be very ashamed!
Trumpism has arrived!

Alberta UCP roll back protections for LGBTQ students …
The UCP Alberta bill rolls back protections for kids when it comes to GSAs in schools and allows schools to contact parents when their child joins a GSA. The NDP wants to ensure students’ rights and privacy are protected.
Assholes.

CaptureAlberta Conservative MLAs celebrate immediately after repealing protections for LGBTQ students

The Alberta United Conservative Party caucus released a disturbing photo hours after a marathon vote in the legislature that shows UCP MLAs celebrating the end of protections for LGBTQ students.
The law pertains to NDP legislation that enshrined protections for gay-straight alliances in schools, programs that supporters argued would provide a safe and welcoming space for vulnerable LGBTQ students.
The new law strips legal protections for LGBTQ students and GSAs. Schools will now be able to contact parents if their child joins a GSA, limiting the privacy of LGBTQ students.
Overturning the law was a major promise made by Jason Kenney during the Alberta election. The votes took place over a marathon two-day voting session as opposition MLAs did everything possible to delay the final vote.    from North99.org 

In case you’d like to share your perspective with these assholes …
click HERE
or, just go straight to the source …
1-888-465-2660
info@unitedconservative.ca 
Questions or comments to the UCP caucus …
1-780-644-2297

So, from all of us here, to all the members and supporters of the Alberta UCP …

FUCK THE UCP

Demented History: The Revolutionary War

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George Washington, seen here leading his troops into the Battle of LAX, one of the bloodiest battles of the entire war. 300 men were lost on runway 2 alone when run over by a 737.

“The Continental Army… manned the air, it rammed the ramparts, it took over airports, it did everything it had to do.”
– Alleged President Donald Trump, July 04, 2019

In Depends Day

A message from the Resident of the Once United States …

Ladies and gentlemen …

The vacuous vermillionaire himself …

Recently voted “Most likely to do serious federal penitentiary time” …

You know him, you love him <cough> …

The glorious leader Sum Dim Phuc

marry independs day

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>><<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

And because at the Trump household EVERY day is In Depends Day

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available at …

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WOO HOO! The emperor has new clothes!!!

Trump To Introduce New ‘Presidential Attire at ‘Trump Day’ Parade

Washington.    Resident Scump announced this morning that he will be unveiling his “tremendously strong and most magnificent ever Trump Imperial Clothing Line TM during this year’s first ever ‘Donald Trump Day.’
   Bullshit Barbie, Skeletelanne Conway, acting spokesdemon and head hate elf for the Ministry of Demonstrable Falsehoods, shrilly and condescendingly explained to the press that “The holiday was formerly known as Independence Day, but seeing as their will no longer actually be any independence due to the merger between America and Putin Industries TM the president felt that this would be the perfect day to roll out his new gear. And furthermore, there is no way that I am going to let the fake media politicize this amazing moment by the most important and well hung president ever, so there will be NO QUESTIONS FOR YOU JIM ACOSTA AND YOUR FAKE AND VERY SOCIALIST, SOME WOULD SAY COMMUNIST,  HILLARY LOVIN’ MEDIA! … GAWDDAMMIT JIM, THE AMERICAN PEOPLE HAVE SPOKEN!!” The resident’s spokes thing then climbed aboard her broom and ‘POOF!’ she was gone. Everyone in attendance looked around as she flew away, but alas, Jim Acosta was nowhere to be seen. Upon checking in with HR over at CNN it was noted that Jim had been in New Orleans all day and had no idea why “that cray cray bitch was screaming about me.”

baghdad-donnie-by-hip-is-everything
The resident’s new Trump TM brand “Glorious Leader Dress Uni TM” that he will wear for official gatherings such as public lynchings, Klan rallies, mass deportation hearings, self masturbatory military parades and the executions of his political rivals.

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The resident will also unveil his new TrumpTM brand loungewear, from daughter-wife Iskanka’s new Bad-touch DaddyTM line, hot off the assembly line at her head office at Iskankawear TM in Bangladesh. 

Trump spokesliar and full time ‘shroom slurper Rudy “911!!!” Ghouliani also previewed the new “Trump TM 2020 ‘Big Cheese’ line of residential apparel”, a line that pays tribute to the “orangeness that is He” …

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trump-store_ask 4 ivanka

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Word Salad: The Fat Man and Little Boy Edition (Nukes are temporary, real love is 4ever!)

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TODAY’S WORD SALAD BROUGHT TO YOU BT THE LETTERS “W”, “T” AND “F” and the NUMBERS  25, 4, 45

Lades and gentlemen, the resident of the really white states of America and MAGAts everywhere!!!

The glorious leader Sum Dim Phuc …

The  Vacuous Vermillionaire, Chucky Sleaze, the naked emperor.
Fat Donnie McTraitorson!

President Trump: “At the beginning there was a lot of anger between myself and Kim Jong Un, who since, something happened. there was appointed which had happened and all of a sudden, get along.”

Can I get a translator on aisle 45 please?
Word from top, unnamed senior Whiter House officials is that Mike Pence has been urging the president to “just ‘fess up to the American people, come out of the closet once and for all, and be with the Dennis Rodman fanboy murderer of your dreams! We could come out together!”

This episode brought to you by “the choice of dotards and dullards everywhere …

“Adderall, it gets me through the bigly day tremendously. NO COLLUSION!!!”
signature on clear bkgrnd
Acting Russian Ambassador to the United States of America

pfizer ad

Bye Felicia!

Well, finally …
It was Shrek’s last day as the Minister Of Demonstrable Falsehoods at Dumbford and Sons in Washington, D.C. so I thought we should pause a moment for a look back at the career of one of America’s most persistent liars.

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So let’s take a quick stroll down memory lane shall we?

I remember when she first took over for the Mooch …
Right from the moment she arrived it was obvious that she was a breath of foul air …
Baghdad Boob had arrived!

baghdad-boob-by-hip-is-everything

As she got comfortable as chief gas-lighter for one of the world’s most renowned liars she really started to relax and the real Sarah came flooding out …
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Pretty soon her ‘banter’ with the press became maybe her most endearing quality …
warm and fuzzy little gems like this …

acosta rant

It wasn’t long before Sarah found the Yin to her Yang in fellow gas-lighter, incel and ‘shroom slurpin’ bigot Stephen ‘Proud Boy’ Miller, and together they spun some of the most hateful, factually bereft propaganda ever spewed from the Whiter House podium …
or from anywhere for that matter …
american gothic horror story by hip

There were also days where she could just let her hair down and be herself with friends …
at the beach

the Whiter House Christmas party was fuckin’ lit!
whiter house xmas party

Here she is warning the president “the FBI is here! “RUN!!!”
LOL, just kidding, this is actually Sarah’s Whiter House ID badge photo …
sarah screamo

back at daddys house again

Sarah, we’re really gunna miss  …

LOL, nope, we’re not …

Good riddance Shrek, don’t let the door hit that ass on the way out, although I’m sure it would be nice for you if something finally did hit that ass huh?

ewww, just freaked myself out ..

later …