Following is a great description of the Velveeta Raccoon … from a Brit …
written by Nate White:
Someone on Quora asked, “Why do some British people not like Donald Trump?” Nate White, an articulate and witty writer from England wrote this magnificent response.
A few things spring to mind.
Trump lacks certain qualities which the British traditionally esteem.
For instance, he has no class, no charm, no coolness, no credibility, no compassion, no wit, no warmth, no wisdom, no subtlety, no sensitivity, no self-awareness, no humility, no honour and no grace – all qualities, funnily enough, with which his predecessor Mr. Obama was generously blessed.
So for us, the stark contrast does rather throw Trump’s limitations into embarrassingly sharp relief.
Plus, we like a laugh. And while Trump may be laughable, he has never once said anything wry, witty or even faintly amusing – not once, ever.
I don’t say that rhetorically, I mean it quite literally: not once, not ever. And that fact is particularly disturbing to the British sensibility – for us, to lack humor is almost inhuman.
But with Trump, it’s a fact. He doesn’t even seem to understand what a joke is – his idea of a joke is a crass comment, an illiterate insult, a casual act of cruelty.
Trump is a troll. And like all trolls, he is never funny and he never laughs; he only crows or jeers.
And scarily, he doesn’t just talk in crude, witless insults – he actually thinks in them. His mind is a simple bot-like algorithm of petty prejudices and knee-jerk nastiness.
There is never any under-layer of irony, complexity, nuance or depth. It’s all surface.
Some Americans might see this as refreshingly upfront.
Well, we don’t. We see it as having no inner world, no soul.
And in Britain, we traditionally side with David, not Goliath. All our heroes are plucky underdogs: Robin Hood, Dick Whittington, Oliver Twist.
Trump is neither plucky nor an underdog. He is the exact opposite of that.
He’s not even a spoiled rich-boy or a greedy fat-cat.
He’s more a fat white slug. A Jabba the Hutt of privilege.
And worse, he is that most unforgivable of all things to the British: a bully.
That is, except when he is among bullies; then he suddenly transforms into a sniveling sidekick instead.
There are unspoken rules to this stuff – the Queensberry rules of basic decency – and he breaks them all. He punches downwards – which a gentleman should, would, could never do – and every blow he aims is below the belt. He particularly likes to kick the vulnerable or voiceless – and he kicks them when they are down.
So the fact that a significant minority – perhaps a third – of Americans look at what he does, listen to what he says, and then think ‘Yeah, he seems like my kind of guy’ is a matter of some confusion and no little distress to British people, given that:
* Americans are supposed to be nicer than us and most are.
* You don’t need a particularly keen eye for detail to spot a few flaws in the man.
This last point is what especially confuses and dismays British people, and many other people too; his faults seem pretty bloody hard to miss.
After all, it’s impossible to read a single tweet or hear him speak a sentence or two, without staring deep into the abyss. He turns being artless into an art form; he is a Picasso of pettiness; a Shakespeare of shit. His faults are fractal: even his flaws have flaws, and so on ad infinitum.
God knows there have always been stupid people in the world, and plenty of nasty people too. But rarely has stupidity been so nasty, or nastiness so stupid.
He makes Nixon look trustworthy and George W look smart.
In fact, if Frankenstein decided to make a monster assembled entirely from human flaws – he would make a Trump.
And a remorseful Doctor Frankenstein would clutch out big clumps of hair and scream in anguish:
My God… what… have… I… created?
If being a twat was a TV show, Trump would be the boxed set.”
Donald ‘Studmuffin’ Trump’s “doctor” just announced that he gained 4 LBS in the last year and is now coming in at a willowy and uber fit 6’3″ and 243 LBS …
IN RELATED NEWS …
Donald Trump is two inches taller than Justin Trudeau, says White House doctor.
And Colin Kaepernick is 6’4″ and 238 LBS in this pic …
so yeah, the Trump claim seems legit huh?
Maybe the prez and his doctor(?) were misquoted????
Sure, that’s it.
In Parkland, kids who endured the unspeakable emerged with a blunt message for the grownups of America: You are failing us. Their frustration was initially and primarily directed at elected officials in Washington and state capitals around the country, but it also extended to the media. Standing alongside their peers from Chicago, St. Louis, and the District of Columbia, they accurately criticized journalists for mobilizing to cover mass shootings while devoting relatively little attention to the chronic gun violence that exposes children in some city neighborhoods to danger every day.
“Since Parkland” was conceived as an antidote to that imbalance — one powered by young people themselves.
Over the summer, more than 200 teen reporters from across the country began working together to document the children, ages zero to 18, killed in shootings during one year in America. The stories they collected go back to last February 14, the day of the shooting at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School, when at least three other kids were fatally shot in incidents that largely escaped notice. As the weeks went on, the stories came to include children lost to school shootings, as well as to armed domestic violence, drug homicides, unintentional discharges, and stray bullets. The stories do not include victims killed while injuring someone else or in police-involved shootings, nor children who died in gun suicides, for reasons explained here.
As this site goes live on February 12, 2019, the student journalists are still working to report on the cases that continue to come in. The project is intended as work in progress, and we ask your help in completing it. To share a photo or a memory of a young person memorialized here, please email firstname.lastname@example.org. Please also reach out with any corrections, or to notify us of a victim we may have missed.
The reporting you will read in “Since Parkland” is journalism in one of its purest forms — revealing the human stories behind the statistics — carried out on an exhaustive scale. Several partners supported the teen journalists in making it possible. The Trace, a nonprofit news organization dedicated to reporting on gun violence, worked with journalism teachers to provide the students with training and editing. Another nonprofit, the Gun Violence Archive, maintains the running count of shooting incidents from which the project team identified child victims. The Miami Herald provided additional research, several of its journalists reported stories building on the students’ work. The Herald’s siblings in the McClatchy newspaper group contributed stories in their areas. NowThis translated the project to video. Global Student Square helped us recruit more than 100 of the student reporters.
Ultimately, however, “Since Parkland” exists because of the doggedness of the young people who took it on. This was their story to tell, and it is told in their voices.
Through their determination, we have gained an unprecedented account of the full scale and contours of gun violence as it impacts American children.
Not so sure about the last part Spanky …
Apparently Fat Donnie Two-scoops no longer has to leave the Whiter House to enjoy a round of golf at his Mar-a-Lago course. The Washington Post is reporting that resident Scump, the man who daily puts the POS in POTUS, recently added a “room-sized golf simulator” to his personal quarters, which allows him to play virtual rounds at courses all over the world.
This whole “Executive Time” concept that the Office of Sycophants to the Prevaricating Prick has been pushing re: the Velveeta Raccoon’s lazy time is getting a little outta hand. No?
There are a multitude of un-solved mysteries surrounding Fat Donnie’s appearance.
There’s the hair that seems to be sculpted from handfuls of straw and cello-tape, and those toddler sized fingers, but the one question that has escaped any reasonable answer from the beginning … namely, what the fuck is going on with that covering he passes off for skin?
Well, finally, we have an answer …
WTF??!? … say WHAT?!?
You mean these genes???
Yeah, k … seems legit … <cough>
Or, maybe they meant ‘Jean’ from Maintenance and General Services …
They never could spell over at the Whiter House.
On a good day , it’s hard to tell what the fuck this guy is yakkin’ about, and I really, really don’t remember his last good day …
Anyways, here’s your word salad for today …
Ladies and gentlemen … the President of the United States … your commander in thief … the wankspangled hate mango … the Glorious Leader, Sum Dim Phuc …
Take it away Fat Donnie Two-scoops …
(taken from a New York Times interview)
”Well, we’re getting closer. It’s a big deal. It’s a big deal. And we’re going comprehensive. We’re not just — He announced that he was buying — today — a tremendous amount of soybeans and various farm products. It’s a very short period of time for a deal this big. But it’s very possible. But many of the points were agreed to. And some haven’t been. I believe that a lot of the biggest points are going to be agreed to by me and him. In other words, they’re just not going to be authorized to agree to certain things that you folks write about and read about — intellectual property and lots of other things. And I think that will be agreed to by me and him at the right time. Like when you make a big deal, or a big scoop, you have to approve that little thing. And I think they’re probably waiting, they’re waiting for me and him to sit down and agree on five points at the end, or 10 points at the end. You’re going to have intellectual property. You’re going to have theft, because so many things have been, in theory, done a little bit differently. And I think that in the end we’re going to have something that’s going to be very special, if it happens. I could have had a deal done, if I wanted to.”
“I don’t see it, because … so I just gave you a list of a lot of the things we’ve done. And this list isn’t even complete. I don’t even know if you have it. Just grab it. Reading material for the night. I’ve actually had, because they’ve done things that are artificial. So there’s been more of a burden on me than other presidents. Past presidents, yeah. I think for the most part, yeah, past presidents. I really believe, when I say that we’ve accomplished — when you look at that list.”
National security is very important and we’re fighting over — a very important element is the southern border. When we talk about drugs coming from China, the fentanyl — you look at the heroin and a lot of the other drugs, they come from — 90 percent, more than 90 percent — from right across the southern border. And unlike what the Democrats say, they don’t, you don’t bring trucks of drugs through the checkpoints. You bring trucks of drugs by making a right 20 miles, and a left into the country. They’re not bringing, you know, they bring massive amounts of drugs, and they do it because there’s no barrier, there’s no hardened wall that you can’t knock down with your breath. So, Maggie, here’s the bottom line: I love doing it. I don’t know if i should love doing it, but I love doing it. We just had a deal —and I was so looking forward to introducing you because it was very impressive. You know the whole — this room was totally, it was a sea of seats, we had the entire cabinet. They are very impressive people, and I had it all teed up and I said, “Where are they?” Right? I said, “Where the hell are they?”
“And ISIS — we almost have the caliphate 100 percent. What are you talking about?” Like ISIS has got — and I mean, I’m not, by the way — the defeat is an interesting word. Because you can say you have the caliphate, but you’re always going to have people that escape the caliphate and you’ll have people around. There’s nothing — but that doesn’t mean you’re going to keep your armies there and everything. Because you’re always going to have that. Somebody is going to walk into a store unfortunately.
So I wish you could have been here before. Because we had this whole side of the room with secretaries, every one of them. Sonny Perdue. Linda McMahon, big, a big sleeper, she’s phenomenal. Somebody said, she’s one of our best — you know and you don’t ever hear about her or anything. We had Mike Pompeo. We had all of our secretaries, many of our secretaries here, probably half of them. Now I do tell the story about driving down Pennsylvania Avenue, you know. Because I’d been in Washington probably 17 times in my life. And on the 18th time, I was president of the United States. And you know, Washington wasn’t really my place. And I didn’t know people. I didn’t know a lot of people. And I got — I put some people in that I wasn’t happy with and I put some people in that I was very happy with.
The mistake I made is on a couple of books, I never spoke to the people. When you don’t speak to the people, it’s impossible to get … Woodward was a mistake. And that was a mistake where they where I believe he did, he notified a number of people. I really want to speak to, I would have spoken to him in two seconds. But I didn’t speak to him and that was a mistake not speaking to him….And it was a mistake of my staff. [Turning to the White House press secretary, Sarah Huckabee Sanders and saying:] You understand that? It was a mistake of my staff.”
on Roger Stone:
“He was not my consultant. But if you read the papers you know it’s like the media, it’s like but I’ve always liked him. He’s a character, and I’ll tell you what people respect what he said. Bearing false witness, etc. But yeah, people do respect what he said. Bear false witness. I will never testify against the president. He actually said at one time you know he’s said it numerous times, but I heard him say it one time he’s done a great job, he’s a great president, and I will not, you know, lie in order to people respect that so much. They respect that.”
“So let me tell you about about Trump Tower Moscow. This was a very unimportant deal. This was a very unimportant deal. No. 1. No. 2, this was a deal, the only thing you heard is through Rudy [Giuliani]. Is that what you heard? Through Rudy? Rudy was incorrect. No. 1, he was incorrect, and we’ve explained that, he was wrong. Rudy has been wrong. A little bit. But what has happened is this. I didn’t care. That deal was not important. It was essentially a letter of intent or an option. I’m not even sure that they had a site. And if you look at where that was sent to, that was a Michael Cohen thing. If you look, I always say, Why don’t you bring this up, to Jay Sekulow, good guy. I think it was sent to almost like a public address for Moscow. If you take a look at it. Take a good solid look. The original letter or something was sent. They didn’t even have anybody to send it to. I had no money invested. It was a letter of intent, or option. It was a free option. It was a nothing. And I wasn’t doing anything. I don’t consider that even business. And frankly, that wasn’t even on my radar. If you take a look at that, take a look at the deal. There was no money put up. There was no transfer. I don’t think they had a location. I’m not even sure if they had a location. Very interestingly, you know, George Washington ran his business. You can, I guess, you can go long beyond the election, if you wanted to. You know. But I didn’t do that. I have nothing. All I did was be a good candidate. Russia didn’t help me. Russia did not help me. There was no collusion. There was none of that. I was a good candidate. I did a good job. I won’t say whether she was a good candidate or not. I mean, the primary collusion was Hillary Clinton. If you take a look, Peter. I mean, look at that phony dossier. Some of that money, they say, went to Russia. [Tony] Podesta was involved with Russia. You look at the kind of relationships they had. They had real relationships with Russia. I had a potential, a deal that frankly wasn’t even a deal. It was literally — I viewed it as an option. But maybe it was called a letter of intent. Something like that.
Chapter 11, Pin your tail on the donkey: Projecting your way to self-aggrandizement for malignant narcissistic personality disorder sufferers.
In our never ending attempt to bring light and understanding to MAGAts everywhere …
yeah, we actually think of it as a fuckin’ public service so, let’s get on with it …
Projection is a form of defense in which unwanted feelings are displaced onto another person, where they then appear as a threat from the external world. A common form of projection occurs when an individual, threatened by his own angry feelings, accuses another of harbouring hostile thoughts. Also known as Teeny Peeny Syndrome.
Here’s Fat Nixon’s latest ‘projection’ in a lifetime of projection …
President Donald Trump told White House visitors that former President Barack Obama was so lazy that he sat in the Oval Office’s private dining room and “watched basketball all day.” “He just sat in here and watched basketball all day,” Trump reportedly said of former President Obama, The Washington Post reported on Monday, citing White House officials.
Trump also told guests that the dining room was in “rough shape” when he moved in and had a hole in the wall.
An Obama official disputed Trump’s alleged remark, telling the Post that Obama rarely used the dining room for work and did not watch basketball in the room. The official also said there was not a hole in the wall.
The Post also cited former White House aide Cliff Sims, who wrote that Trump often takes guests around the lesser-seen areas of the West Wing and frequently makes comments about former President Clinton’s affair with Monica Lewinsky.
White House press secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders defended the president’s actions, telling the Post that Trump is “proud of the White House and its rich history.”
Keep repeating to yourself and anyone within screaming distance, until you feel better:
”Fuck you Donald Trump! Fuck you Shrek Slanders!”
Remember, while punching a MAGAt or a NAZI squarely and soundly in the face may make you feel better, heck we all feel better when you do, but it won’t solve this problem. Voting, not violence, is the answer.
La Guardia airport was shut down this morning for a while and the official word was that it was because of staffing shortages. We have proof here that that was just fake news. The real reason La Guardia and other airports were temporarily closed was because the skies were full of Trump associates fleeing the Mueller probe, endangering any flights in the area.